Noisy Sight

While I'm overweight, I'm not obese. In fact, in photographs of me taken from certain angles, you wouldn't even think I was fat.

So I was loading groceries into my car this afternoon when I saw a woman chasing her shopping cart. She's a dyed blond (what are they always dyed blonds?). But what caught my attention was not her dark roots. It was her jiggling chest. They were huge, her round breasts. They jiggled, bounced, flapped, and knocked against each other, as she ran. I thought, Good god, woman, pull yourself together and rein the girls in.

I noticed she wasn't exactly fat either. Like me, she could shed a few pounds or thirty, and yes, in some circles, we'd be called voluptuous. But I'd never let my girls wander off each in her own direction all over her body.

She was a noisy sight.