Women Away

In the crisp Fall air of Haliburton and away from my home routine, I slept most of the weekend. I guess I was suffering from Luxor withdrawal and because I was exhausted from days and days of no sleep.

The women of my bookclub are well-read, independent women, grounded in their families and community. And they can be so girly girl the way they do everything together. They make me laugh, long for that feeling of camaraderie, belongingness and self-acceptance, and grateful that I have friends who accept me as I am in all my crankiness.

Saturday morning, the women were up by 8 am. I heard them talking and laughing. I thought, What the heck are they up so early at the cottage for? They made coffee, cleaned up, moved things around. At 9:30, I stumbled out of my bedroom and sat on the sofa, still half comatose. They offered:

-Coffee, Sylph?
-How about some tea?
-Want some juice instead?

They were all washed and dressed. There was a flurry of activity as they took things out to make breakfast.

I said -Can you all just stop moving for a sec?

They laughed me off and said -You'll feel more energetic after some coffee.

I said -No. There is too much activity too early in the morning.

They made breakfast and set the table as I sat there trying to wake up with my coffee. We gathered at the table to breakfast. The First woman said -Is there jam or something to put on the toast?

The Second one said -Oh I'll get up. She got up to go to the fridge.

The Third said -And I brought some marmalade. She got up to get it from her box.

First said -Don't get up, let me get them. She got up to receive the jams and marmalade from the other two.

I said -Is everything a group activity with you guys?

They laughed and said -Oh stop being so cranky.

Later, we got dressed for a hike. A true group activity this time. The First woman said -Hey where are my hat and gloves. I left them on this chair yesterday.

The Second said -I put them on your bed last night.

First said -Where?

The Third said -You must've left them on my bed. I found gloves and a hat on my bed when I went to bed last night.

Second -What did you do with them?

First -Was it a knit hat with black leather gloves?

Third -I put them on that chair. She pointed at the chair beside First's chair.

Second -I've got lots of hats and gloves if anyone wants to wear them.

Third -Here they are. Are these yours?

Second -Do you have gloves? Do you want a hat?

I said -My god, does it matter? Can you stop prattling? We are just going out for 10 minutes.

They said -Well, someone is in a bad mood this morning.

The next morning, when I got up, the women were again showered and dressed. The First said -Gee, I don't know if I want to go for a walk before or after breakfast.

Second -I really need to go for a walk.

First -Where should we walk?

Third -We shouldn't go too far because we are all going for a long walk before we leave today.

First -Do you want to go now or after breakfast.

Second -I want to go now.

Third -I don't care. I'll go whenever you go.

First -Let's go now.

Second -Where do you want to walk?

I said -Can you just go and not keep talking about going?

First -Actually, I don't want to go yet. My hair is still wet. I don't want to catch a cold.

Second -True. Let's go after breakfast.

Third -Let's make breakfast. What do you want to make?

I said -Okay, I am going back to bed now.

And so the whole weekend was like that. Every activity was discussed over and over and the details rehashed before anyone did anything. The only thing I wanted to do was sleep or read.

Once, I complained that it was too cold in the cabin. Then I got up and went to the washroom. When I came back, one woman had fluffed up several pillows and stacked them in my corner of the couch. She held a blanket, ready for my return. She said -Sit down, I'll make you warm.

I said -No no, I don't want to sit there with a blanket over me like a little old lady.

She threw the blanket over me and pretended to throttle me.

I had to laugh. I said -Look how you are being so thoughtful and generous even when I am so rude and ungrateful.

I love these women. I like how their lives merge without reservation. I like how they include me in their activities and still let me be. In fact, I think most of my friends are like that. Maybe that's why they are my friends. Somehow, they feed my soul.