Going To The Dogs

At the soccer festival prep session yesterday, the organizers managed to get several dogs and their owners out for a preview of the soccer dog parade. There were big dogs and little dogs, all wearing soccer dog jerseys.

One of the organizers, a candidate trying to unseat the current city councillor in our ward, came with her little yappy dog. But she didn't have a proper dog jersey. She brought a tiny green t-shirt with a number on it. It belongs to one of her kids. She put the shirt on the dog and the dog wore it looking...none the worst.

After a while, the candidate handed the dog leash to my friend and said, "Can you hang onto him for a sec. I need to chase down the camera crew." My friend took the leash and peered at the dog this way and that. She's not a dog lover. But you wouldn't know it because she's a photographer and her specialty is dogs. She saw something out of whack with the yappy dog. One of his front legs had slipped out of the sleeve of the t-shirt, or maybe the leg was never in. She bent down and tried to fix the problem but she was obviously uncomfortable since she didn't want to touch the dog and she kept saying, "Yucky, yucky dog."

For goodness sake. You can't fix a shirt on a dog that the dog shouldn't be wearing by not touching the dog. So I bent down, patted the dog, and tucked his front leg into the t-shirt sleeve. The dog was surprisingly compliant.

When the candidate took her dog back, we walked about a bit. My friend pointed at the t-shirted dog and started laughing. The dog had peed in the t-shirt. The shirt was now dragging on the ground and the dog was tripping over it with every step. One of the shop owners agreed to lend the candidate a real dog jersey, which she quickly put on the dog.

Later, the candidate said, "I want to visit the stores to talk to the owners but I can't go in with my dog."

I said, "So leave your dog with us."

"But I'll be inside the stores. Sometimes he bites when he can't see me."

"Your little dog?"

"Yes."

"But he let me fix his t-shirt earlier. I picked him up and tucked his paw in the sleeve."

"He let you do that? You sure it was my dog?"

"Yes. I handled your attack dog?"

There was the dog, looking sillier than usual with a jersey on, sitting on the ground between us, quiet as a mouse. He was paying attention to another soccer dog.

That soccer dog is a lizard, about three feet long, resting on its owner's arm. It too was wearing a soccer jersey. Apparently, the lizard has been featured in many soccer stories in the community newspaper during soccer season. In the dog parade, the owner puts the lizard on a leash, soccer jersey and all, and it walks on the ground, trying to keep up with the dogs.

When the camera crew came, the dogs and lizard got all the attention. The samba drummers and dancer also got some footage. The rest of us were just backdrop.

I got home and took a nap, sleeping through the 6 o'clock news and missing our moment in the end. Ah well.