Little Things

The Boy and The Exchange are away at a cottage. Time to get tight with The Man again. He confesses to being jealous of The Exchange. I don't know why. It's not like I would actually touch the boy. The Man says he doesn't want to talk about it. He just says he doesn't like seeing me go ga-ga over the boy, and he would prefer I not talk to him so much.

That's crazy talk. I already know I cannot accommodate The Man's request. First, we are not in high school, and second, The Exchange is my son while he is in Canada. How can I not talk to my charge? Indulge my crush. It's such a small thing to ask.

Still, it's good to have some adult time with The Man. First thing we did, we smoked a joint last night. It pretty much knocked us out. As part of the recovery today, I slowly cleared out my basement "office". It's so unfair to keep referring to this space as my office. It's insulting to my work, when I work. This room is really our storage space.

So today, I cleared the room to put in more shelving. I am moving my closet down here and giving The Boy his closet back. The closet unit I bought is a complicated arrangement of wires and rods. I gave up on the instructions after the first read. I had no desire to rewrite them. Which does not bode well if I want to return to work as a technical writer.

Thankfully, The Man figured it out. I now have my own closet, for the first time in this house, after almost 20 years. I feel cleaner and more organized for the Fall now that my storage is in order. Funny how these little things make one feel so in control of one's life.

But it's always the little things. Little things said or not said, little things done or not done, that make or break relationships, that shape or unscramble our lives.

I was thinking tonight that if I had received a few words of encouragement from any of my university teachers, I might have chosen a totally different career path. If The Man hadn't done all the little things he did in the seventh year of our marriage, I might have moved on. If I hadn't off-handedly said yes to the community projects that came my way, I wouldn't have many of the friends I have today. If my friends and I hadn't exchanged little words of support, understanding, and laughter here and there over the years, I might be a very lonely woman today.

So here's to all the little things in our lives that we don't always pay attention to or are often not aware of. May we have many little things in our lives that make us feel joyously alive.