Life's Like That

One day, mom noticed I had a new electric kettle. She said she wanted one too. The stove-top, no-rust kettle she was using had rusted. She was mad. I asked her how old the kettle was. She said, "I don't know...20, 30 years?" So I said, "Okay, let's all upgrade to the modern age."

The next time I was at Loblaw's, I bought her the kettle. But before I had a chance to give it to her, The Man and I chanced up Barrie way. On the way back, he stopped at a Home Depot. There, I saw a different model of electric kettle. One with a base. That means she could lift the kettle off the base to fill it at the tap without having to unplug the kettle. So I bought that kettle for her instead.

Back in the city, I gave her the kettle I bought in Barrie and returned the one I bought at Loblaw's. The next day, mom phoned and said, "This kettle doesn't work. The lid won't close and it doesn't shut off automatically. I've tried to boil water three times and it never shuts off. I have to manually flick the switch."

Well. This week, I brought mom with me to the Home Depot nearby to refund the kettle. She told me, "I don't want one with a base. I can never get the kettle to sit in it properly."

"Without the base, you will have to unplug the kettle every time you fill it."

"I would rather do that than try to make it sit in the base."

At the return desk, the woman examined the kettle. She fiddled with the lid, then with great force, pounded the lid into the kettle to make it close. She said, "It's new, that's why. I have the same kettle and the lid didn't quite fit at the beginning. But once you use it, the lid will close. The automatic shut-off switch won't work unless the lid is closed."

A man who was standing by waiting for a refund said, "That's right. There's a sensor attached to the lid and if the lid isn't closed, the shut-off won't work."

Mom took the kettle and tried to lift the lid off but couldn't. The waiting man took the kettle from mom and tried to pry the lid off. It wouldn't budge. The return desk woman took the kettle from him and with great force, pulled the lid open.

"There," she said, "You just have to do this a few times and it will be smoother." She forced the lid on and off a few times. Mom took the kettle and tried to pound the lid closed. She couldn't. The man beside her tried also. A few attempts later, he finally got the lid closed, but then he couldn't get it open again.

I said to the return lady, "This kettle is not going to work for us. Mom isn't going to the gym to build muscles in order to train the kettle to open and close. Besides, she doesn't like the base. We just want a refund."

So she gave us a refund.

Then I brought mom to Loblaw's and she chose the same model kettle I returned last week, one that you have to unplug to take to the sink. But before taking the box home, she took the kettle out, opened and closed the lid a few times, and satisfied with its construction, went to the cashier with it.