Greatness

My sister-in-law just became a grandmother. Her daughter gave birth to a girl this weekend. Without undermining the family's joyous occasion, let me have an old fogey moment: I am good with being a great aunt, but I am not ready to be a great-aunt.

This senior nomenclature disconcerts me. There is a physical family generation between me and this newborn. Nothing makes me feel my age more than moving one generation closer to extinction. I didn't do anything to bring this on; this is life happening to you.

I've read that men feel their mortality when they have children. The Man certainly said so when The Boy was born. At the time, I said, Pish posh, I feel vibrantly alive, all powerful and potent, I am a giver of life and now I am going to mold this life. Despite The Man's expressed vulnerability, he turned out to be a great dad. Now it's my turn to feel my age.

I hope my niece feels vibrantly alive, that she has the power to shape her life and that of her daughter's. I hope she draws from the feisty, creative strength within to take care of herself and help her daughter navigate through life. I know, the baby was just born and this is a lot to pay attention to, both mother and baby are so young. But someone has to send wishes their way while they are awe-struck with their immediate needs. I found this poem and wishes for her:

May you feel at home in your body with all its changes and the marks of its experiences.

May you get to know your baby as a person, shaping into an individual you both know and find mysterious.

May you continue to get to know yourself as a mother, shaping into someone who is both her old self and someone completely new.

May you find the time to care for yourself, for your own health and your own goals while you manage the complete responsibility of dependency.

May you sleep with dreams that refresh and calm you for the next day.

May you use your new power of mother love to reach out to the world and change it for the better.

May you have the confidence to speak your mind, act on your convictions and declare your intentions for your life and the planet your children will inherit.

May you be spared heartbreak and suffering in your heart, home and family.

May you discover a sense of newness in each moment in the life of your child and the adventure of parenting.